It can be hard to know whether or not you’re in the right place in your life to get involved with someone, or how seriously you should allow yourself to become involved at this point. Fortunately, there are a lot of helpful resources out there that can teach you about dating and relationships, healing from hurt, and how to know when it’s time to begin again.
One of the best resources, we hope, will be the list below. We’ll cover 10 surefire signs that you’re ready to get back in a relationship. Plenty of people find themselves asking, “am I ready to date?” The short answer is that only you can determine that. The long answer you’ll find throughout the tips below.
If you are trying to decide whether now is the time for a relationship, look for the following signs.
You’re confident and secure in who you are
If you’re asking, “am I ready for a relationship?”, you need to make sure that you’ve regained your confidence. If you still feel insecure or worry too much about what others think of you, you probably need to take a little more time before putting yourself back out there. On the other hand, if you’re confident and happy with yourself, you’ll find that it might just be time to share that with someone else.
You no longer think about your ex in the same light as you used to
It can take a long time for you to get over those feelings of loss, missing your ex, and even loving them, despite how badly things ended up. Perhaps it was an amicable breakup, and you still have feelings for him but you know that being together doesn’t work. Over time, you will get used to the idea that you’re not together and start to think of them differently. That’s usually a good sign you might be ready to date again. [Read: 10 Great First Date Topics]
You’re thinking about love again
Even just thinking about dating or falling in love again can be a good sign that it might be time. Having thoughts of new love is an indication that you’re probably over the last hurt. Of course, check with yourself and make sure that you’re thinking about love because you want it, not because of need or desperation—those could be signs you’re still working through the last one.
You know what YOU really want
Another good sign that it’s time to get back out there is that you know what you want and are willing to do whatever it takes to get it. If you’re asking, “Am I ready for a relationship?” and you already have an idea of what you are looking for, as well as what you won’t settle for in terms of a partner, it’s probably a good sign that it might be time. Think about what you do and don’t want from dating and relationships before you dive in. [Read: EliteSingles – Is it Worth Your Time?]
You are excited at the prospect of dating
Excitement is another good indicator that it’s time to get back out there. For some people, dating can be nerve-wracking. Others might find it stressful and awkward. And still, it offers a sense of excitement because under the nerves and awkwardness is the potential to meet a great person who could become a great mate. When you notice that you’re starting to get excited about dating again, it could be time.
You can see what you did wrong in the past
Growth is a good indicator of progress. If you can look at your past relationships and see where things went wrong, including how you impacted the outcome, it is a sign that you have grown and perhaps gotten over the last hurt that you faced. If you have a trail of toxic relationships in your past and you still don’t understand what happened, it might mean that you should take some more time for self-reflection and to figure out where you are and what you want. If you need to make changes or improve yourself, you’ll see that here, too. [Read: How to Date a Single Mom ]
You find yourself attracted to someone
Attraction comes and goes throughout life, but if you find yourself attracted to a person beyond just their initial looks, it might mean that you’re ready. Perhaps you haven’t officially started looking for dates again, but you’ve met someone and you find them attractive. That’s an indicator that you are probably on your way to being ready for a new relationship. Of course, if you just find yourself having random crushes or seeing people as physically attractive, you might not be quite there yet.
You know you are done mourning the old relationship
There comes a time when everyone knows that they’ve reached the point where they will no longer mourn the loss of their last relationship. You can generally get a sense of feeling better or notice that you are no longer feeling sad or thinking about the “good old days” like you used to. Whatever signs there are, and no matter how subtle, they are indicators that you’re ready to move on because you have dealt with the past.
You’re willing and able to be honest and open with another person
This is perhaps one of the biggest pillars of a healthy relationship. If you are not in a place where you feel like you can be honest and communicate openly with someone, you might not be quite ready for a relationship. The best relationships are built on honesty and trust, so make sure you’re ready to commit to that. [Read: Challenges of Dating a Divorced Man]
You’re not bringing your baggage to a new relationship
While you may find someone who will help you deal with the baggage you’ve yet to unpack, you shouldn’t drop it at their doorstep expectantly. Make sure that you deal with your “stuff”, if you will, before trying to get involved with anyone else. It’s not their job to fix you—you have to do that yourself.
If you’re still toying with the idea of talking to your ex, or if you are still feeling desperate when you think about dating, it might not be time. However, it will be up to you to decide. There’s no shame in being alone for a little while, so don’t worry about getting back out there until you’re good and ready.