A lot of the dating content that you find online focuses on women and their dating concerns. While that’s all well and good, what about the men out there who want a little guidance and support? How to act on a first date? Fortunately, there are a growing number of resources available, including this guide here.
In addition to helping you understand how to quell your nerves, we’ll provide 10 tips for first date success. Even if it doesn’t go exactly as planned, you will still be able to enjoy yourself and take the experience for what it’s worth.
And without further ado, here are 10 first dating advice for men that will ensure that you don’t have to be nervous or worry about having a good time.
Tip 1: Be Yourself
This is often the most difficult part of dating for men. It can be hard to just be yourself when there’s so much competition out there that seems so much better than you. Plus, even subconsciously, we can tend to want to be what someone expects or is looking for, even if that’s not quite in line with our “self”, per se. Trust us, though. If you want an amazing first date, start by just being you.
Tip 2: Be Confident
This could be a bit of a contradiction to the first tip for some, but it’s critical. You have to know that you have something to offer and that you’re worth dating. Insecurity is not attractive and women will quickly know whether you are really confident or if you’re just trying to act the part to impress them.
Tip 3: Don’t Try So Hard
The most common reason women don’t have a good time on a first date (besides total incompatibility, of course) is because men try too hard and end up overdoing it. Women don’t want someone who’s constantly going out of their way or working SO hard to get noticed. Just be you, as discussed in the first tip, and let the date flow naturally.
Tip 4: Ask Questions and Listen
A lot of guides will tell you to ask questions, but very few remind you to also listen to her answers. Too often, people get caught up in thinking about their responses or just don’t know how to actively listen. Take the time to listen and show her that you’re listening by responding in kind. It goes a lot further than you think, and it will also help you learn about her so that you know whether it will also help you learn about her so that you know whether you’re interested in a second date. [Read: 10 Tips For A Second Date ]
Tip 5: Be Unconventional
Women have been on dozens of dates in their lifetime. They’ve talked to probably dozens, or hundreds, of men. If you roll in with the same old lines, they’re going to notice. Do something different. Get creative with first date ideas. Don’t just ask them what they are looking for or take them out to yet another dinner.
Tip 6: Be Clear with Your Intentions
No one likes being misled. For that matter, there’s no reason to mislead someone when it comes to the first date. You both are entering this with no previous experience or expectations from each other. Be upfront and clear about what you’re looking for so that you’re not wasting anyone’s time. Even if you just want to have some fun with casual dating, make that clear in case women you come into contact with are seeking something more serious.[Read: 10 Tips for Younger Men Wanting to Date Older Women]
Tip 7: Offer to Pay
A lot of guides and tip lists will tell you that you have to pay for the first date. And yes, that’s the chivalrous answer, but it’s not necessarily what women want these days. You should offer to pay for the date, and assume that if you invite her out, she’s expecting you to cover any related costs. After all, why would you take her somewhere that costs money if you weren’t planning to pay? You can’t really assume that she’ll have the money, let alone that she’ll want to go on a date with a man that isn’t prepared to pay.
Tip 8: Go for Lunch or Coffee Instead
You can take a lot of the pressure off that first date and all those nerves by choosing a more casual first encounter. Historically, people have been keen to go big when it comes to a first date. While that grand gesture is great, the option to go more casual is also helpful and offers a more enjoyable, stress-free experience for everyone. [Read: What to do After First Date With a Guy]
Tip 9: Watch the Pet Names
Some women like pet names. Others might, but only once you’ve been together for a while. Pleasantries might be pleasantries to you, but some women find them demeaning. Try to avoid words like: babe, sweetie, honey, dear, baby, etc. She may feel like you are being condescending or that you don’t respect her—even if that’s not the case at all. Make a good first impression by using her name and not treating her like the next girlfriend before you even know if you want a second date.
Tip 10: Put Your Phone AWAY
Unless, for instance, you’ve got kids at home and you need to have your phone accessible in case of a call or text, you don’t need your phone on a first date. Put it on Do Not Disturb mode and put it face down on the table or leave it in your pocket. Then, if you’re needed, you’ll know and you won’t be distracted. If you’re both too busy on your phones, no one is paying attention to the date that’s going on. [Read: 8 Great Tips for Asking Guys Out]
These first dating tips for men should help you quell the nerves and have a good time, no matter who you’re going out with. It’s natural to be a little nervous on first date adventures, but if you keep these tips in mind, you’ll be able to get past that.